Teh Gladiators Comic

The Beast's Been... Leeroy'd?

Sun, 28 Jun 2009 10:00:00 GMT

The History of Royal Powdering Sessions "In order for a noble Blood Elf of finest heritage to feel comfortable about himself and full of magical prowess, one must know how to properly apply fine make-up to one's soft and smooth cheeks. A descendant of the royal blood shall lightly tap his wonderful, pale gold skin until one feels the fine grains of powder caressing the thin magical field of pure beautiful that engulfs a Blood Elf's face. One must engage in a powdering session for at least 26 hours of each day. If one cannot find enough hours in a single measly Human day, like a true Blood Elf, one shall bend the will of the Gods, twist the blazing surges of pure magic to squeeze more minutes out of each day. At least 5 minutes of each day should be spent on congratulating oneself on a job well done once the fine powder has been sufficiently applied. Blood Elves of royal descent shall not speak to anyone or engage in any stupid earthly activities like waging war while one's face is not as beautiful as the falling autumn leaves of a singing magical oak. Signed, Unknown aspiring Blood Elf nobleman."

The Beast Rares Its Ugly Head(s)

Sun, 21 Jun 2009 10:00:00 GMT

It's so hard staying awake when you want to sleep. I think, in general, one should not write when feeling like six tons of sugar have been crammed into one's capillaries. Capillaries have absolutely nothing to do with caterpillars and that is an awesome fact to establish at this hour. Why? Why not? Ghosts. Weird stuff. Does anyone buy it? I don't know, so the temperature in the room goes down and you feel a "presence". OK, and what can this "presence" exactly do to you? I have no idea. Ghosts are like these impotent brutes that try to bully you by blowing really hard at your toes. You don't bully someone like that! Get over it, you are dead little sprites dancing around in the air like disco oranges. What was that? I think they are coming. Who? The soccer moms! A whole army of them! Their cheap body lotions will blot out the sun! Finally, about the comic, I like the last picture. It made me giggle. Giggling is a stupid word. Giggling is a verb. I am going nuts. Night. Happy Monday! New Post! I've just had what you call an epiphany. (Thank God for spell checker, else I'd look even dumber than usual.) In any case, I figured out I'd have some time in the day to continue to post here even though the latest page is up. Wanted to talk about the comic a bit. No, actually, first, I want to say a few things about myself. I am a 32-year-old working stiff. This should put things in their proper context. Now to my point (which oddly enough has nothing to do with the comic), professionally speaking, there are two types of "working Joes" which drive developing businesses. Ones who are very systematic and methodical in their approach to learning new things and ones who rely on pure instinct and spectacular extrapolations of logical ties that lead to solutions based on relatively mediocre knowledge of the subject matter. (Dangerous path to thread.) I am generalizing things terribly here, making them sound much simpler than they are, but let's say, for the sake of the argument, I have identified and want to talk about the aforementioned two professional personality archetypes. While the former offers a steady, incremental rise to success, the later is marred with constant ups and downs, not to mention a sharp discord in other people's perception of that person, a very dualistic assessment (by others) of their worth. Because worth can be very tangible and measurable, I am able to claim there is worth to these "disco banana" professional personality types. The problem is, society as such enforces certain standards that, if only partially, mold one's road to success (or as it so happens) failure. What makes things even more complicated is that inconsistent, creative types constantly balance on this edge of society-defined disaster. Their lack of motivation to define themselves towards others in a predictable (and thus more appreciated) manner overshadows the good things that (sometimes) come out of their rather spontaneous outbursts of productivity. (Yes, I f---ing know who I'm psychoanalyzing, thank you -- that's the whole point of rambling on blogs.) What's even more ironic is that the consistent, methodical achievers and the sparkling "creative hobos" go together like nachos and hot cheese. Unfortunately, the later group's passion and vigor for life end up being mere tools of the former's desire to control through reassuring predictability. But here's the kicker. This is a known fact to both sides; many can bracket themselves into one group or the other, but neither side really wants to budge. Because it is the natural order of things.

Eyelids Like Tauren Butt

Sun, 14 Jun 2009 10:00:00 GMT

I am truly and honestly willing to write a good post for you guys, but I have one tiny problem. My eyelids feel as heavy as Tauren ass. So I must sleep. Good night. Is it Monday? I can make the case that Monday has indeed kicked off in some portions of the world. Not mine, mind you, but why be selfish about it? Right?

"FREEEDOM!"

Mon, 08 Jun 2009 10:00:00 GMT

The action takes a dramatic turn as Leeroy does his best reenactment of "Braveheart." Things slowly start to unfold; it's like peeling the thin sugary layers of Baklava one at the time. Like sticking your finger into a really rich ham, cheese and mayo sandwich. Jesus, there I go thinking about food again... breakfast time!

What's Your Cooking Skill?

Mon, 01 Jun 2009 10:00:00 GMT

So cooking. I don't like it all that much. Never saw the draw in leveling any of these "secondary" professions. In fact, not only do I not see the draw in leveling secondary professions, I don't see the draw right now in playing the game at all. Making another break as it were; I've acquired more or less all the items I wanted out of PVP (not that hardcore so as to go for Tier 2 weapon); 2v2 Arenas are beginning to feel way too repetitive. It's true, in large part, you've won or lost by simply stepping out of the gate. These days we have to play extremely well to beat a Prot Healing Pala (those are insane) and a DK, or a good DK/Druid combo. They simply have way too many weapons against us. Likewise, many combos simply don't stand a chance against Druid/Warrior. That said, 3v3 feels incredibly bursty (almost retardedly so). The entire strategy comes down to nuking one target as fast as possible; there is very little strategy involved and so I'm taking a break. Never was a fan of the PVE content - Ulduar feels too "outerworldly" for my taste. I'd want to see another Blackrock Depths, I'd want to see something like the Blackrock Mountain again. I want the feel of Tarren Mill/South Shore battles - you know, the stuff that actually feels like you're playing Warcraft. Anyway, I'll probably be back for Season 7. Have absolutely no desire to endure all the knee-jerk reaction class changes that are happening in the game right now. As good it is for the devs to take this Agile, Scrum-like method to game development, their decisions create an aura of uncertainty. It feels too much like the ground is moving beneath your feet every time you step into the world. But that's just me I guess.

You Chums Suck At Planning!

Mon, 25 May 2009 10:00:00 GMT

So, out of boredom, I've started doing the Argent Tournament quests. I'm pleasantly surprised, they're not half bad. I even read the Black Knight quest chain - it's a little cliche, but it's decent enough I guess. No more trite than the plot I'm writing for the Glads anyway. Regarding today's comic, I call this "plot building through a series of silly decisions." Something I rather enjoy (God only knows if you will). Turns out Teh Glads is the sort of comic that simply can't live as a series of "instanced" mini-episodes. No matter how I swing it, I always end up trying to build up the story to something. Not deliberately, mind you.

I Am the Juggernaut!

Sun, 17 May 2009 10:00:00 GMT

I did this comic as a homage to my favorite new Warrior skill - the much-disputed Juggernaut. But, it's not really so much the skill, it's the fact how funny it has become to see two Warriors charge each other in the arena and miss by a mile every time. Given that Juggernaut is on a 12 second (soon to be 15-sec) cooldown, the whole situation can sometimes get quite retarded from where I'm standing. So I used it as a mini-theme of this comic, as our brave heroes make their way towards the Lich King's stronghold and the chips start falling where they may. What dastardly plan have Thrall and Varian hatched and what the hell are Gorrok, Spin, Vallant and Leeroy heading into? Find out in the pages to come, I guess. Or don't.

Blacksmitta Got Da Bling-Bling!

Mon, 11 May 2009 10:00:00 GMT

Seriously, I figure that Forsaken blacksmith must be the richest NPC in the entire expansion pack. I don't care what you say, but I've spent quite a few gold having my armor repaired there, and, although it might hurt your pride to admit it, I'm sure you did too! I see him as being this sulky, hardworking corpse during the day and a completely pimped-out, pwn-plates-sporting socialite hanging out at the Gothic Undead night clubs when the sun sets. He'd be like: "Keep the Cristal flowing in them mana pots; don't make me go ninja with mah bling-bling!" Has his Undead posse from the hood (corpses from adjacent graves), and all that.

'Twas About Yous All!

Mon, 04 May 2009 10:00:00 GMT

The pot thickens!!! (The number of words I write in the post is inversely proportional to the number of words I write in the panel.)

I Said RIDE!

Mon, 27 Apr 2009 10:00:00 GMT

So my guild has downed The Iron Council yesterday. I must say I am pleasantly surprised with the quality of the Ulduar content. I was fairly skeptical about it being on a par to what Blizzard claimed was their finest work (Naxx), and since, stylistically, the two dungeons are so different, I am not sure I can give (to myself) a definitive answer. Either way, it was fun raiding at a new place. I'm up to Freya in 10-man and the dynamics of each of the fights was very decent. The hard mode addition is great for keeping the encounters (moderately) fresh even after all of the content is bested. I've also started the new Arena season with my Pala partner. We're all right, as long as we don't run into too many Priest/Rogue teams, which more or less have their way with us if they know what they're doing. Finally, about the comic, this is a quick little episode to tide us over as the story progresses. Even so, I've enjoyed it; the art is good and it's got a certain charm in its simplicity.