Determining our individual identities can be quite the challenge. Who defines who you are?

At first glance, this seems like a simple enough question, especially coming from the individualistic western perspective. I define who I am. I make decisions that determine my outcomes in life, representing a strong internal locus of control. However, when you stop to think about how we choose to define ourselves, how we choose to determine our respective identities, we find that we are inherently bound to the people around us.

Who Am I and Why Do I Matter?

For instance, you may define yourself as a father and a husband. These roles are intrinsically tied to your children and your spouse, respectively. Without these people in your lives, you couldn’t call yourself a father or a husband.

Similarly, many of us define who we are based on our occupation or career of choice. When asked to say a little something about themselves, most people will mention what they do for a living. I’m a freelance writer. With this declaration, I become immediately aware of certain preconceptions and assumptions that people may have about people who work from home or people who write for a living. For a while, I felt like I almost had to defend my career choice.

All Eyes on Me?

It’s easy to say that you shouldn’t care what other people think of you. Be your own person and make your own decisions, right? If that were the case, why do we partake in acts of vanity like buying designer clothes or decorating our homes in anticipation of having guests? Humans are social beings, so we care what other people think. That only makes sense.

That’s also why you may find yourself wanting to be someone else at many points in your life. The grass does look greener over there, doesn’t it?

A Kitten, A Lion, or Both?

In the end, as with so many other things, you must find that delicate balance between an internal and external sense of self. You must simultaneously be complete within yourself and be mindful of how you are being perceived. You can’t please everyone all of the time (nor should you try to do so), but mere social awareness can go a long way in determining your own identity and happiness.

If you see a lion in the mirror but everyone else sees a mere kitten, that disjoint or dissonance needs to be rectified. Show your inner lion.

Eating pho, the Vietnamese beef noodle soup that we popularized through the Dot Com Pho phenomenon, isn’t exactly the most expensive thing in the world in the first place, but I guess every buck you save is well worth the effort. I was directed toward a thread in the Red Flag Deals forums, telling everyone about the anti-crisis special at Pho Viet. As you may be able to figure out by the sign on top of the car, every bowl of pho noodles is on sale for $4.99. You could say that the you could buy some pho pho pho ninety-nine (pho for four 99).

Located a very short drive from Les Faux Bourgeois, Pho Viet (2142 Kingsway, Vancouver) is selling $4.99 pho for the month of July. Everything else on the menu is 15% off to boot. Oh, and the tax is included too. If you’re looking for one of the better deals in town, you just may have found it.

When we arrived, we were the only table there. That’s not a good sign. It’s possible that they’re just dealing with the recession, but when your restaurant is completely empty during lunch hour, it usually means that your food isn’t very good. Thankfully, a few more tables showed up shortly after we did.

The dining room was remarkably clean for a pho restaurant and it seems like they made quite an effort in terms of the decor. But what about the food? How did this Vancouver restaurant stack up?

The first thing that hit me was that they didn’t bring us iced water or hot tea; instead, we were treated to chilled tea. That’s fantastic for the summer. I was disappointed, however, that the Vietnamese iced coffee came pre-mixed in the glass; there’s something inherently enjoyable about watching the percolator do the drip thing.

Regarding the bowl of noodles itself, the portions were good, the beef tasted fresh, and the noodles were about the right consistency. However, the soup base was too salty for my tastes (hello MSG) and you could see the oil floating on the top of the soup; when I took a picture with the flash on (with my Nokia E71 smartphone), all I got back was a big white reflection. I had to turn off the flash to get this pic.

Service was good. Decor was good. The portions were very reasonable and the “anti-crisis” special price was great. However, the soup base makes or breaks a nice bowl of pho noodles and that’s where Pho Viet comes up short in my books.

I don’t want the soup to be bland, but I don’t want it to be this salty either. Further still, the regular prices for most of the menu items are too high, compared to many cheaper alternatives along the pho-infested Kingsway corridor. This place is worth a try at $4.99 (including tax), but I wouldn’t pay $8+ for it.

Three days ago, we were flying the maple leaf in celebration of Canada’s birthday. Today, we take the opportunity to fly the stars and stripes to celebrate America’s Independence Day. I’d like to wish a very happy Fourth of July to all of readers from south of the border. Get out there and enjoy your fireworks, barbecues, and beers chilled beverages of choice.

It isn’t nearly as much of an issue today, since it happens to be a Saturday, but international holidays always present an interesting conundrum for freelance writers like me. While the majority of my income (and clients) hail from Canada, I do work with several Americans and with people all around the world. It’s not always entirely clear whether it can be a real day off for me or not, since it may be a holiday here and not somewhere else.

But it’s Saturday, so I’m going to treat it like a Sunday. That makes sense, right? Happy ID4! You’d better hope that Will Smith is available.

Mythbusters

Is it possible to maintain a conversation while skydiving? Is a hot water heater really a rocket in disguise? Can you cook a hot dog by electrocuting it underwater? These are some of the questions that Mythbusters aims to answer, even if they don’t have any direct impact on your day to day life. Even so, there are many lessons to be learned, like correlation does not imply causation and we shouldn’t believe everything we see on TV or in movies.

There are many things that you may assume to be common knowledge, but many of these supposed “facts” aren’t true at all. You can tune in through the Discovery Channel to learn about exploding sharks, the bacteria on your toothbrush, and how to beat radar detectors. Alternatively, you can find Mythbusters on DVD to watch the episodes at your leisure. There’s so much to learn! Trivial knowledge is, arguably, the best kind of knowledge.

The Dog Whisperer with Cesar Millan

Even though I may not be a dog owner myself, I feel that we have a lot to learn from the Dog Whisperer. Cesar Millan says that he rehabilitates dogs and he trains people, because it is never Fido’s fault. Through the Dog Whisperer, we learn not only how to best interact with our canine companions, but also about the importance of being calm, assertive and balanced.

I found that many of the training techniques that Cesar employs on the show can also help you interact with dogs who aren’t your own. My friend’s dog has a habit of “wandering” when she goes for a walk, so I used some of the techniques described by The Dog Whisperer when I took Phoebe for a walk. She very quickly learned to stay by my side and not to go bounding off on her own. You may also learn how to best handle the aggressive dogs in your neighbourhood.

The Dog Whisperer can be found on the National Geographic Channel.

House Hunters International

Some people say that one of the best places for you to invest your money is in real estate. Some people say that one of the best places to spend your money is on international travel. House Hunters International effectively approaches both of these areas of interest, walking us through the process of buying a home in many locations around the world.

You may recall that real estate is one of my little known interests, so this show is a natural fit. I learn a lot about what to look for when buying a house, as well as some of the regional differences when it comes to buying a home. Choosing a loft in New York City isn’t the same as looking for a villa in rural Spain.

House Hunters International, as well as related shows like Property Virgins, can be found on HGTV.

The Deadliest Warrior

Who would win in a fight between William Wallace and Shaka Zulu? What would happen if the Italian Mafia faced off against the Japanese Yakuza? The Deadliest Warrior simulates these battles that never happened in real life and never could have happened. There is even an episode featuring the legendary Spartans made famous in the movie 300.

In this show, which you can find on Spike TV, they equip these historical warriors with the weapons that they would have used at the time. For example, the Spartan was given a short sword, shield, spear, and javelin in his simulated battle against the Ninja, who was given a ninjato, black egg, shuriken, blowgun, and kusarigama. They test the relative effectiveness and simulate 1000 battles to see who is the deadliest warrior. Very cool.

House, M.D.

This television show happens to occupy a very special spot on this list, because it happens to be the only one that is fictional. Whereas the other shows are very much meant to be educational, House is a medical drama. That does not mean that you have nothing to learn from this show, however, and that’s partly why it’s one of my must-watch shows on television today.

Yes, part of the appeal has to do with the cold, calculating, and cynical nature of the show’s title character. The educational side is definitely there too, teaching us about part of the medical diagnostic process, a myriad of different conditions, and some of the ethical issues that may arise along the way. You can find many of the seasons on DVD if you need to catch up. Otherwise, the show is syndicated on Fox.

Do you have any favourite educational TV shows? I think that Jeopardy! could make the list too, but its lack of depth and discussion explain why it didn’t make the cut for me.

While you could certainly get the gist of your meaning across with improper grammar, this can reflect poorly on you and your company. Having good grammar is paramount for establishing and maintaining a professional image and the respect of your colleagues.

Some time back, we discussed the difference between “less” and “fewer.” Both of these terms refer to having a smaller quantity of something, but they cannot be used interchangeably. In similar manner, there is a difference between how you use “much” and “many.” These sound similar, but you cannot use them interchangeably.

Thankfully, the rules for choosing between “much” and “many” are very similar to the ones you’d use for choosing between “less” and “fewer.”

MUCH is used when modifying nouns (items, objects, people, etc.) that are typically uncountable or not typically counted. For instance, you could achieve much success in your life. It would not make sense to say that you have achieved three successes, because the noun “success” is not quantifiable.

MANY is used when modifying nouns that are countable. It would make sense to say that I review many gadgets as part of my freelance writing work. This is because it is possible to count the number of gadgets. It would not be appropriate to say that I review much gadgets.

It is not a matter of singulars and plurals, since both “much” and “many” are used to modify plural nouns. If you are having trouble understanding the difference between the two, remember the strategy that I described when discussing less and fewer. Put a number in front of the noun in question. If it makes sense with the number, use many. If it sounds wrong, use much. Three phones makes sense, so you could say many phones (and not much phones).

Do you have a suggestion for another Grammar 101 post? Let me know through Twitter or the comment form below.

Before we get to the rest of today’s post, I like to wish my fellow Canucks (and everyone else for that matter) a very happy Canada Day! I am very proud to hail from the land of maple syrup, the embrace of multiculturalism, and universal health care. Happy Canada Day, everyone!

With that out of the way, you may have also noticed that another month has come and gone. It is time once again for me to give my due respect and thanks to the people who make Beyond the Rhetoric what it is: the commentators top thinkers! These people help to further the conversation, demonstrating that a blog is not just a soapbox for a single individual (me), but also a platform for the masses (you). Who had the most to say in June?

Just like last month and the month before, we find a familiar face sitting on top of the list for June 2009. Ray Ebersole is the top thinker yet once again. Recently on his blog, he commented on the new way to Google known as Microsoft’s Bing. Have you Bing’d yet?

Betshopboy gets the silver medal for last month. He’s doing more than leaving comments on this blog, however, as it seems that he’s running several marathons this summer. The most recent one was at Mount Faber and he finished the 10km run in just under 50 minutes.

Taking home the bronze is Lesley, a gal who recently called me one of the “most reputable bloggers in the lower mainland.” Thanks for the compliment! Inspired by my Grammar 101 series of blog posts, the “starving college girl” decided to do one of her own, clarifying Twitter terms. You are tweeting, not Twittering!

One of the names that we haven’t seen quite as often around here is Ben Pei, who comes in fourth for June. Like many of the people in my inner circle, Ben is interested in blogging and how to make money online. You’ll want to excuse the mess at his site for the moment, because Ben Pei Dot Com is under renovation. When the new theme goes live, Ben plans to launch a contest to celebrate. Stay tuned!

Rounding out the top five for June 2009 is our good friend dcr (Dan C. Rinnert). If you’re looking for one of the stranger articles on his site, you’ll want to see his recent psychedelic blog post. I just finished reading it and I still have no idea what I was supposed to take home from it. What do you think?

Working from home as a freelance writer, one of the greatest challenges that I encounter on a daily basis is finding that delicate balance between work and leisure time. I’ve commented on this flexible work schedule on several occasions, reiterating that while I can work at nearly any hour of the day, I almost feel compelled to work every hour of the day. That can’t possibly be healthy, so I’m always looking for ways to better achieve a life-work balance.

When the computer is on, it means that I have the opportunity to hop in front of that keyboard, pump out a couple of articles, and make some more money. I am certainly not opposed to making more money, but it cannot come at the expense of my happiness and my health. As such, one of the simplest ways to find a better work-life balance is simply to walk away from the computer. Unfortunately, that’s not so easy, especially when you are virtually addicted to the Internet. So, what is a freelancer to do?

As it turns out, our computers have a built-in mechanism for getting you to step away from them: battery life. Naturally, this only really applies to the notebook users in the audience and not so much to the desktop users, but if you use a laptop as your primary computer, it could (ironically enough) easier to walk away.

Let’s say, for example, that your laptop is able to get about four hours of battery life. If you think that you are going to have trouble shutting it down and calling it quits for the day, simply unplug your laptop from the wall four hours before you want to walk away. When the battery runs out of juice, you effectively force yourself to stop working for the rest of the day. It’s almost like you are trying to schedule your spontaneous leisure time, since you are using a mechanism that can (help) make the world of work go away.

If your laptop is able to achieve a monstrous 22 hours of battery life, like the image depicted above, this strategy might not be very useful for helping you overcome burnout. However, most laptops don’t get that kind of battery life, so you are able to step away whenever you run out of juice. For a myriad of reasons, you probably shouldn’t come to rely on the laptop battery life strategy for life-work balance, but it can be a useful tool to try.

Go ahead, take the night off… even if you can’t get yourself to do it voluntarily.

One of the single greatest things that I love about Vancouver is that it is absolutely a mecca for fantastic food. It doesn’t matter if you are interested in inexpensive comfort food or sixty-dollar hamburgers, because there’s bound to be a place in town that will suit your palate (and your wallet). Normally, you’d think that dining at a French bistro would have to be an expensive scenario, but that is not the case with Les Faux Bourgeois.

I was invited out to dinner by my good friend Joseph Planta of The Commentary (he interviewed me a while back) to check out this place last night. Who am I to refuse an invitation for some fine Vancouver dining? Located near Fraser and Kingsway in East Vancouver, Les Faux Bourgeois is a quaint little French bistro in the heart of the city.

Because its location is a little tucked away from the main roads, it can be pretty easy to miss. I didn’t even know that this French bistro existed! Now that I do, I know that I’ll be back. The food was cooked beautifully and, better still, everything on the menu is priced affordably. You will not find an entree over $20. Because it is a smaller place, reservations are highly recommended. Joseph tells me that they can oftentimes book out more than a week in advance!

(Please excuse the picture quality as I only took them with my camera phone.)

We started off with the Pate de Campagne (Pork Liver Pate). This was served chilled and with bread.

For my entree, I had the lamb cheeks. They were served with apricots and some sort of couscous. I really didn’t even need a knife for the lamb, since the chunks of meat just melted into my fork (and in my mouth). Utterly fantastic.

Susanne had the Canard Confit (Duck Leg Confit). It was served with roasted potatoes and some sort of wild bitter green salad. Not pictured is Joseph’s dinner of a beef tenderloin served with layered potatoes.

For dessert, we had the lemon cream tart. It tasted almost like a lemon meringue pie, minus the meringue. We also had a couple of drinks along the way (the bar menu is very reasonably priced as well).

I’d like to tell you about the total bill for three, but before I had the chance to take a look, Joseph snatched up the bill and took care of it. That was wholly unexpected! Thank you, Joseph, for a wonderful evening and thank you, Les Faux Bourgeois, for a stellar meal!

Even though I have a certain level of freedom when it comes to determining my work schedule, I still adhere mostly to a conventional work week. The vast majority of what I do is achieved Monday through Friday, taking Saturday and Sunday as days of rest with a relatively minimal amount of work being accomplished.

One of the things that I’ve always valued dearly is my sleep. Some people are willing to sacrifice those precious hours of rest so that they can go out and do what they need (or want) to do. For these people, they may be able to survive on less than six hours of sleep, but that’s not for me. This is especially true on Sundays when I know that I don’t have much in terms of obligations. I can choose to work less if that’s what I desire.

So, while I could expand this blog post quite a bit more, I think I’m going to draw it to a close here and turn the mic over to the Beyond the Rhetoric readers. On Sundays, do you sleep in and take it as a day of rest? What does sleeping in mean to you? 10am? Noon? 4pm?

As you may recall, I was over in Los Angeles earlier this month for E3 Expo 2009, the largest video game trade show in North America. In addition to seeing the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man, I was also able to check out a variety of video games that have yet to be released. Some of these were out on the show floor, whereas others were only behind closed doors.

One of the games that required a private meeting was “Fairytale Fights” from Playlogic. On the surface, this may look like another cutesy game for the younger set, but this couldn’t be further from the truth. Yes, we get to see characters who are “inspired” by fairy tale characters, like Lil Red Riding Hood and Snow White, but they’re not exactly damsels in distress.

Instead, they wield incredible sharp weapons and they’re not afraid to use them. Using the controls, you are able to hack, slash, and decapitate your enemies at will. This really is one big bloodbath and they even have interesting “liquid effects” that let you slide across the pools of crimson.

Check out the trailer below. “Fairytale Fights” is set for release on multiple platforms this November.